What causes stress ?

Previously people lived a less intense live, following more closely their internal clock. In recent decades, however, the pace of life has accelerated dramatically and most of us experience our days as an emergency situation, which requires continuous action and no rest. And precisely because there is no time for rest and leisure, we move more and more away from ourselves and become more and more stressed. The main reasons that cause stress in modern life can are as follows:

Too many obligations

The chronic stress we are experiencing daily, like the stress caused by a bad marriage or a by a job that is too demanding, is causing health problems. It is clear and proven than when facing chronic stress, the autonomic nervous system is affected and thus causing stress. The stress in turns causes overwork, overwork causes exhaustion, exhaustion causes depletion, and depletion makes us collapse and also is the cause of various diseases. The first symptoms are relatively mild, chronic headaches and increased sensitivity to cold. As the stress cycle continues, health problems become increasingly serious in both physical and mental level. An estimated 90% of doctor visits are related to stress. Most of the common diseases are associated with a chronic form of the insomnia, depression, mental disorders, muscle pain, hair loss, diabetes, sexual dysfunction and cancer.

When the enemy is our self

Sometimes we sabotage ourselves by being impatient with others or causing undue tensions due to psychological pressure. Some of the more common ways that we undermine ourselves and if effect we create more stress are:

Negative thoughts

Sometimes the enemy is in our head. The way we talk to ourselves, although generally formed in childhood, it follows us throughout our lives and plays a significant role to all our experiences. If we are accustomed to think and speak negatively then this is a major source of stress. Fortunately, it is never too late to learn the power of positive thinking.

Poor skills to deal with conflicts

Conflicts with others are a part of life and we need to know how to properly handle them so that our relations become stronger and not a source of stress. And this does not mean that we must be aggressive towards others, or to let them treat us because we cannot say ?no?.

Pessimism

The pessimistic people see things worse than they are in reality and that prevents them from seeing the possible solutions and opportunities presented before them.

The taking of too many commitments

Everyone reacts differently to stress. Some withstand pressure more and others less. The taking of more responsibilities than someone can handle is a source of stress.

Managing stress
The key to success is to think positively; take control of your stress and anxiety by learning effective techniques to combat it. Relaxing bodily tension in order to reduce the physical sensations of stress is a good place to start. If your body is free of tension your mind tends to be relaxed.This helps you concentrate and study, take decisions and solve problems. When you are relaxed, you can view each task as a positive challenge, and use stress as a stimulus to help you to carry it out giving you a relaxing glow of achievement afterwards.

Looking after yourself
Be kind to yourself. Give yourself "me time" in which you can choose what you want to do: Rest; do nothing; try a relaxation technique, massage or yoga; have a long hot bath; spend time with friends; treat yourself to something special. Taking proper breaks and eating well do help to combat stress.

Confronting the problem
Try to stand back and look at the problem carefully. Break it down into manageable parts. Talk it through with someone else, brainstorm solutions, or get help if you need it. Try to manage your time effectively and learn to say "NO". Avoidance won't make the problem go away and can often make it worse. Leaving everything to the last minute is a major source of stress for students. Think about why you are finding it hard to get started: uncertainty about how to do the assignment, fear of being judged or failing? Starting a piece of work effectively reduces stress levels as it frees your mind, putting the thoughts of failure back into perspective. If you've had a row or a misunderstanding with someone, it rarely helps to avoid the issue. Talking it through with the other person or with someone outside the situation, often helps you express your feelings, regain a sense of proportion, and identify a way of resolving the differences.

Find some distractions
Sport and physical activity helps you to relax physically and also releases endorphins in the body which produce a real feeling of well-being. Walk, cycle, swim, join a gym or a sports team. Joining a club or society, maintaining an existing hobby or learning something new, talking to other people... can all help you to take a mental and physical break.

Express yourself
Talk about it, write about it, shout or moan about it: expressing your feelings can help to relieve stress. Acknowledging a problem to yourself and to others can be the first step in dealing with it. Sometimes having a good cry or bashing a pillow can release emotional pressure and calm your feelings of anxiety.

---

　　work-life balance: tips to reclaim control
when your work life and personal life are out of balance, your stress level is likely to soar. use these practical strategies to restore harmony.
by mayo clinic staff

there was a time when the boundaries between work and home were fairly clear. today, however, work is likely to invade your personal life — and maintaining work-life balance is no simple task. still, work-life balance isn't out of reach. start by evaluating your relationship to work. then apply specific strategies to help you strike a healthier balance.
married to your work? consider the cost

it can be tempting to rack up hours at work, especially if you're trying to earn a promotion or manage an ever-increasing workload. sometimes overtime may even be required. if you're spending most of your time working, though, your home life will take a hit. consider the consequences of poor work-life balance:

fatigue. when you're tired, your ability to work productively and think clearly may suffer — which could take a toll on your professional reputation or lead to dangerous or costly mistakes.
lost time with friends and loved ones. if you're working too much, you may miss important family events or milestones. this can leave you feeling left out and may harm relationships with your loved ones. it's also difficult to nurture friendships if you're always working.
increased expectations. if you regularly work extra hours, you may be given more responsibility. this may lead to only more concerns and challenges.
strike a better work-life balance

as long as you're working, juggling the demands of career and personal life will probably be an ongoing challenge. use these ideas to help you find the work-life balance that's best for you:

track your time. track everything you do for one week, including work-related and personal activities. decide what's necessary and what satisfies you the most. cut or delegate activities you don't enjoy or can't handle — or share your concerns and possible solutions with your employer or others.
take advantage of your options. ask your employer about flex hours, a compressed workweek, job sharing, telecommuting or other scheduling flexibility. the more control you have over your hours, the less stressed you're likely to be.
learn to say no. whether it's a co-worker asking you to spearhead an extra project or your child's teacher asking you to manage the class play, remember that it's ok to respectfully say no. when you quit doing the things you do only out of guilt or a false sense of obligation, you'll make more room in your life for the activities that are meaningful to you and bring you joy.
leave work at work. with the technology to connect to anyone at any time from virtually anywhere, there may be no boundary between work and home — unless you create it. make a conscious decision to separate work time from personal time. when you're with your family, for instance, turn off your cell phone and put away your laptop computer.
manage your time. organize household tasks efficiently, such as running errands in batches or doing a load of laundry every day, rather than saving it all for your day off. put family events on a weekly family calendar and keep a daily to-do list. do what needs to be done and let the rest go. limit time-consuming misunderstandings by communicating clearly and listening carefully. take notes if necessary.
bolster your support system. at work, join forces with co-workers who can cover for you — and vice versa — when family conflicts arise. at home, enlist trusted friends and loved ones to pitch in with child care or household responsibilities when you need to work overtime or travel.
nurture yourself. eat healthy foods, include physical activity in your daily routine and get enough sleep. set aside time each day for an activity that you enjoy, such as practicing yoga or reading. better yet, discover activities you can do with your partner, family or friends — such as hiking, dancing or taking cooking classes.

know when to seek professional help

everyone needs help from time to time. if your life feels too chaotic to manage and you're spinning your wheels worrying about it, talk with a professional — such as a counselor or other mental health professional. if your employer offers an employee assistance program (eap), take advantage of available services.

remember, striking a healthy work-life balance isn't a one-shot deal. creating work-life balance is a continuous process as your family, interests and work life change. periodically examine your priorities — and make changes, if necessary — to make sure you're keeping on track.